


There’s no starting over, no new beginnings, time races on (And you've just gotta keep on keeping on)

by LoserLucas (planetsandstars)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Friends to Lovers, smut but not too detailed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-27
Updated: 2014-09-27
Packaged: 2018-02-19 00:38:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2367833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetsandstars/pseuds/LoserLucas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He knows he wants to spend forever kissing Ashton and being cute together because he does like Ashton, he’s just scared. But he also has Anna who he really likes and cares about so he can’t like Ashton. He just simply can’t. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Or Luke has some crazy feelings for Ashton and can't admit he loves him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There’s no starting over, no new beginnings, time races on (And you've just gotta keep on keeping on)

**Author's Note:**

> Second post! I'm scared because this is so different from my other story. 
> 
> I do not condone cheating and Luke acts very badly in this story. You should not cheat on people in real life!
> 
> (Title taken from 'My Silver Lining' by First Aid Kit.)

It’s always been there, at the back of his mind, this _thing_ with Ashton. Luke thinks it used to be admiration because Ashton was older and more experienced and far cooler than Luke could ever hope to be, so he watched and followed and attempted to copy. Because he was young and naïve and Ashton was practically his _idol_.

 

Except with time it changed and Luke started to notice how cute Ashton was with his giggle and curly hair and sometimes looking at Ashton became a little _too much_. And he didn’t know how he really felt, just knew he felt _something_.  

 

And then they’re shoved into the limelight, famous overnight, and it’s all their Christmases come at once and it’s overwhelming in a good way because it’s what they’ve been working for for so long. But now Luke can have any girl he likes. They all can. So he goes out, tells girls they’re pretty, let’s them cling to him and laugh at whatever he says. He fucks them as well (of course), in bland hotel rooms in countless cities and he _enjoys_ it.

 

But there’s always that thought in the back of his mind that this isn’t what he really wants. And he’s not too sure what he does. But he is sure it isn’t mindless groupie sex.

 

***

 

At this point Luke isn’t even bothered with how he’s supposed to keep this relationship up he’s just so happy to finally be _in_ a relationship.

 

He meets Anna when they have time off and she almost makes up for the fact that he hasn’t been home in _forever_.

 

Really he thinks he was lucky to get her because he was sure it was Ashton she was looking at since he was looking particularly good that night (not that Ashton ever looks bad, or that Luke spends a long time looking at him but _still._ )

 

It’s nice because it’s the first time in a while he’s had something steady and someone who he really likes. They spend as much time together as they possibly can, both aware that Luke will be leaving in a few days time, moving on to a new city. They’re not officially dating or anything, because they only just met, but Luke really likes her and she seems to really like him (beyond him being famous). And when he’s leaving and she spends one last night with him they promise to try and work through the problem of not being in the same city. Luke is optimistic that it can work.

 

***

 

It happens when they’re stuffed into one of the club’s booths at the back, it’s only designed for two people but it was the only free seat left. Ashton is pressed so close to Luke he can feel the uncomfortable outline of his phone in his pocket; Luke keeps shifting awkwardly (not that the others pay much notice since he’s an awkward person anyway).

 

Ashton’s trying to say something to Calum, who despite leaning across the table can’t seem to tell what. Ashton flails his arms uselessly before settling back against the seat with a huff. Calum shrugs and leans in to say something to Michael. Luke takes a large gulp of his drink because he’s way too uncomfortable and maybe being drunk will help.

 

“Luke” Ashton whines in his ear dragging the word out. Luke turns and Ashton is so close he could so easily kiss him and . . . _what?_ Luke mentally kicks himself because nope, that was _not_ an acceptable thought. Ashton whines again.

 

“What is it?” Luke asks, still shaken from thinking about Ashton _like that_ and hoping it was only the alcohol clouding his brain.

 

“I’m tired” Luke tries not to smile too wide because Ashton is famous for being a sleepy drunk, whenever a large quantity of alcohol hits his system he turns into the human embodiment of a week old kitten. Ashton rests his head on Luke’s shoulder, his breath hitting Luke’s neck and it’s far more intimate than Luke needs right now.

 

Still he doesn’t complain when Ashton’s arms come to wrap around him because Luke likes cuddles, especially band mate cuddles, so he does nothing (despite how being this close to Ashton has his palms sweating for some really dumb, stupid reason).

 

They stay like that for a while until Michael kicks Luke’s foot to get his attention and coos at the pair. Ashton’s breathing has evened out and Luke is sure he’s very close to actually falling asleep.

 

“Come on, let’s get you back”

 

***

 

Luke doesn’t think about his ridiculous feelings towards Ashton, well he _tries_ not to anyway. He blames it on the alcohol because he has Anna and he doesn’t like Ashton in _that way_ and neither does Ashton and . . . 

 

“Luke!” Luke jumps and turns to face Calum who’s looking at him rather concerned.

 

“You okay? That sandwich is pretty sad looking” Luke glances down at the sad, crumpled sandwich he’s holding which he made half an hour ago and quickly shoves it back onto his plate.

 

“I’m fine” he answers, Calum nods but obviously doesn’t believe him as he slides onto the bed next to Luke.

 

“Okay, so tell me what’s up” Luke lets out a long breath and rests his head on Calum’s shoulder.

 

“It’s nothing, I’m fine, honestly”

 

“I don’t believe you. You’ve been too quiet all day” Luke buries his face deeper into the soft fabric of Calum’s jumper. Snuggly, tour bus Calum is his favourite Calum.

 

He doesn’t want to tell Calum because there’s nothing to tell. He was drunk and Ashton was in close proximity, he can’t be blamed . . . not that there’s anything to be blamed for. He didn’t _do_ anything. And he’ll never. Because Ashton is his friend. One of his _best_ friends, so no.

 

Luke jumps again when Calum taps him sharply on the shoulder. He’s sure he’ll die one day from his band mates scaring him when he’s thinking. It’s obviously a sign he should think less, for his health.

 

“What’s gotten into you today?” Calum sounds a little exasperated, which Luke didn’t mean to do, he just wants Calum to stop asking him if he’s okay because he’s _fine_. So fucking fine it’s unbelievable in fact.

 

“I keep telling you nothing!” Luke sounds a lot more annoyed than he really is and he regrets it when Calum moves away and stands up.

 

“Don’t, I’m sorry” he doesn’t want to be alone because thinking about Ashton scares him. His feelings scare him.

 

“No it’s obvious you don’t want me around, I’ll go” and he heads off to probably find Michael. Luke mentally kicks himself because he’s a terrible friend. Not only is he craving one in ways that are totally _not_ platonic and are positively terrifying he also annoyed another by thinking too much about the first. He flops back on the bed and covers his face with his blanket. Everything sucks.

 

***

 

As expected it’s hard to Luke to be with Anna. It’s not only that their schedule is absolutely packed, although that is pretty shit, it also has something to do with the fact that they’re in different time zones. Finding a time when they can both sit down and just talk is nigh on impossible. And it leaves Luke feeling completely awful and in some terrible bad moods. Even Michael has been wary of saying anything for fear of the explosive response he might get.

 

*

 

 

Ashton’s ‘no hugging/cuddling/any physical affection’ rule doesn’t seem to apply to Luke (although it’s something he tries not to think about too much because it complicates things further).

 

Not that Luke’s complaining because it means whenever he’s feeling sad and whenever he hasn’t seen Anna in too _freaking_ long he knows he can find Ashton and tuck himself neatly into his side.

 

Sometimes he’s glad he’s the tallest and youngest in the band, it gives him something to tease the others about, but he does like it enormously when Ashton lets him fold himself up so he can fit into Ashton’s arms (not that he has a favourite, except he totally does, because he thinks Ashton gives the best hugs). Like now, when there’s some other _problem_ and he can’t see Anna again and he feels sad and frustrated and he goes to find Ashton where he last saw him, eating on the sofa.

 

“Ashton” Luke whines and plonks himself down next to Ashton who looks away from the TV.

 

“You okay? Okay stupid question, you’re not . . .” Ashton turns the TV off and makes himself confortable because he knows once he has Luke tucked into his side or on his lap he won’t be moving for a while. Luke settles into position and they lie there for a few moments.

 

“What’s up? Relationship troubles?”

 

“Of course” Luke huffs, “I just wish it was easier, you know? Like I want a normal relationship, is that too hard to ask?”

 

“Aw baby” Ashton coos and Luke elbows him in the stomach, which ends up badly as he hurts himself more than Ashton.

 

“I hate you” Luke grumbles but tries to snuggle impossibly closer because Ashton is wearing Luke’s favourite hugging jumper and it’s nice and soft and he’s comfy.

 

“In all seriousness it sucks” Ashton says.

 

“I know, I just want to be able to do normal relationship stuff . . . like this!”

 

“Are you saying I’m your replacement girlfriend?”

 

Ashton sounds falsely offended and Luke _should_ laugh, tell him no and plead Ashton to put on some trashy TV show and play with his hair the way he likes.

 

Except he doesn’t because he’s thinking. Thinking about how easily he and Ashton fit together and how easily he could lean up and kiss Ashton but more importantly, and scarily, how much he _wants_ to.

 

***

 

Luke thinks about Ashton a lot over the next few days. Usually it’d be easy, he’d go out and get exceptionally drunk and find a string of random girls to kiss to take his mind off it. Except he can’t because their schedule ridiculous and _more importantly_ it would be wrong because of Anna. Luke ends up groaning into his pillow in frustration.

 

“You okay? Either you’re sexually frustrated or you’ve got a problem” it’s Calum and Luke curses this band for knowing him too darn well. He turns his head to the side to peer at Calum.

 

“It’s the second”

 

“Okay . . .”

 

“Come on lads we’re going out tonight!” Ashton shouts, jumping around and nearly hitting his head on his bunk. Luke pales because the last thing he needs right now is a cuddly drunk Ashton to complicate matters further.

 

“I’m not feeling up to it”

 

“Oh come on Luke, you’re 18, you should be dying to get out there”

 

“Plus your mum isn’t here to say no” Calum says and he and Ashton start giggling and Luke buries his face back into his pillow and flips them off.

 

***

Ashton wins in the end and a few hours later Luke’s on the dance floor of some club, after consuming an array of multi-coloured drinks, with Ashton pressed far too close to him. It’s not by _choice,_ it’s that the club is packed and Ashton insisted they dance, but instead of focusing on eyeing up any girls Luke is hyper aware of Ashton’s bare arm pressed against his.

 

“You alright?” Ashton practically shouts in his ear.

 

“Yeah yeah” except he’s not. He’s drunk and confused and overwhelmed so he tears himself away from Ashton and makes his way away from the crowd and towards the bathroom.

 

“Fuck” Luke leans against the sinks in an attempt to calm down which isn’t helped when a moment later Ashton comes in and wraps an arm around his waist.

 

“Hey, what’s up?” Ashton’s speech isn’t slurred and maybe he’s less drunk than Luke thought, he’s less drunk than himself that’s for sure. Ashton is so close and Luke can see a few extra curly strands of hair by his ears and how he hasn’t shaved in like forever and, “I’m sorry about his”, he leans forwards and crashes his lips against Ashton’s.

 

He meant for it to be brief, so he knew what it was like, he wasn’t expecting Ashton to rest his hands on his back and kiss back rather forcefully. He opens his mouth to let Ashton lick into it because he’s been thinking about this for way too long now and it’s _happening_.

 

In the end Luke has to pull way because he can’t _breathe_ and when he braves looking back at Ashton he looks curious.

 

“What was that for?”

 

”I just  . . . I wanted . . .” Luke stammers, terrified he’s ruined everything between them.

 

“It’s alright” Ashton says gently “I liked it” and he strokes Luke’s hair briefly before leaving.

 

Luke collapses back against the sink because What. The. Fuck just happened?

 

***

 

Luke wakes up the next morning significantly later than the others, in fact Michael’s eating his third packet of crisps by the time he resurfaces with the worst morning hair known to anyone in the entire universe, ever.

 

“Late one last night, eh?” Calum teases and Luke’s glad Michael’s preoccupied with whatever new game he’s got because he’s not in the mood for talking about last night because it was confusing as fuck.

 

He notices Ashton’s not there and is glad because he doesn’t think he can bear to face Ashton for at least a thousand years. He goes to the kitchen to make the largest bowl of cereal possible and _doesn’t_ think about kissing Ashton.

 

*

 

When Ashton does come out of hiding everything seems fine. He doesn’t act weirdly or differently towards Luke and seems to have totally glossed over the fact that he had his tongue shoved down Luke’s throat the previous night. Luke’s not bothered though because he’s far too mortified about the whole thing.

 

They go about their day as usual and Michael teases Luke for missing his mum and Calum hits Michael because they ‘don’t joke about that kind of shit’ and Luke lies on top of Calum as they watch Michael play his game to show they’re still friends and Ashton jumps about doing 10 million things at once without really _doing anything_.

 

In fact by the time they get to the hotel Luke’s practically forgotten about the thing with Ashton and gladly follows him up to their hotel room, looking forward to a proper shower and a nice sleep. Luke heads straight for the shower when he’s thrown his bag haphazardly on the bed and comes out a while later to find Ashton staring at him. He suddenly feels self-conscious.

 

“Um . . .”

 

“I think we should talk about the other night”

 

“Oh, um okay” Luke’s heart feels like it’s about to beat right out of his chest as he sits down on his bed facing Ashton.

 

“Do you like me Luke?”

 

“’Course I do, we’re like best friends . . .” Luke attempts to joke.

 

“No, but do you like, like me?” Luke wants to laugh because Ashton said like, like as if they were ten years old but his palms are too sweaty and he’s way too nervous.

 

“Um . . .”

 

“Do you want to kiss me again?”

 

“I . . .” but before Luke can answer Ashton moves to sit next to him, places his hand on top of Luke’s and touches their mouths together briefly.

 

Ashton pulls back to look at Luke who nods and Ashton leans in again.

 

It’s different this time because it’s not rushed and Luke realises Ashton is actually quite sweet and gentle and a really good kisser. Ashton leans back after a moment more and moves away.

 

“Do you like me Luke?”

 

“I . . . I’m not sure”

 

***

 

“I’m not sure” except Luke knows he is. He _knows_ he wants to spend forever kissing Ashton and being cute together because he _does_ like Ashton, he’s just scared.

 

He also has Anna who he really likes and cares about so he can’t like Ashton. He just simply can’t. Except he _does_ and he keeps thinking about what would’ve happened if he’d have said yes and wishing that he had.

 

Ashton’s been acting distant recently. They haven’t exactly fallen out, just they’re on a break of sorts, which Luke completely understands.

 

*

 

“I miss you so much” Anna says and she sounds genuinely sad.

 

“So do I” Luke replies but it’s more an automatic response and he’s not sure if it’s 100% true.

 

*

 

They’re out again and Luke’s kind of drunk and Ashton’s kind of drunk and they’ve kind of forgotten about things and are on the dance floor together. There’s a cute girl who keeps looking across at him and Luke is temped to go over except he’s a nice guy and _Anna_.

 

Luke momentarily closes his eyes because he’s drunk _again_ and confused _still_ and . . . he’s aware of someone pressed right up against him, and he opens his eyes to see it’s Ashton. Ashton moves against him, arse pressed right against Luke’s cock and Luke practically groans because it’s all too much. Ashton moves away looking far too smug.

 

“Still unsure Lukey?

 

 

 

(And if they end up making out in the bathroom no one has to know)

 

***

 

Luke wakes up with a cracking headache and a sore back from where Ashton shoved him into a cubicle when they heard someone coming into the bathroom. Which was kind of bad (and gloriously good) because it gave Luke all sorts of ideas about Ashton being all rough and dominant with him.

 

“Luke you can’t ignore what happened last night” Luke looks over to see Ashton with his sleep rumpled hair and bleary eyes behind his glasses and thinks about waking up to it every morning. It’s a nice thought. Luke scrubs his hands over his face.

 

“I like you Ashton I really do . . .”

 

“ _Except_ . . . why is it so hard for you to admit your feelings?” Ashton sounds really quite hurt.

 

“Because I’m scared! This is all very new and terrifying Ashton”

 

“Don’t you think it is for me as well?” Luke sighs.

 

“Yes, I’m sorry” Luke climbs onto the bed next to Ashton and rests his head on his shoulder. He thinks he could get used to being the little spoon in this relationship.

 

“We’ll do things slowly yeah?”

 

“Yeah okay”

 

***

 

Luke wakes up every morning next to Ashton _happy_ , which is totally cheesy and dumb and stuff but it was something he’d always wanted out of a relationship. To be with someone he _really liked_. It still scares him sometimes and he still feels a little overwhelmed and totally out of his comfort zone but he tries not to care when Ashton is just _there_.

 

(He’s not all that sure therefore why he lies to Ashton and tells him he’s called things off with Anna.)

 

***

 

The first time they do anything beyond just kissing is a little scary because Luke’s never done this before with a boy and Ashton’s fumbled around a little but this is _Luke_ , it’s different. They fall onto the bed together and Ashton resumes kissing Luke, running a hand gently up his side because he’s nervous and can only imagine how Luke feels.

 

“You okay?” Luke nods, his heart racing because this is real and kind of scary. But he trusts Ashton.

 

Ashton leaves the bed for a moment and Luke feels rather nervous and he can’t find a comfortable position to lie in. When Ashton returns he climbs back on top of Luke and kisses him for a while, which Luke is grateful for.

 

“You ready?” Luke nods and lets Ashton undo his jeans and pull them down (which is a heck of struggle and causes them to break into a fit of giggles at how totally unsexy they’re being).

 

Eventually though they succeed and Luke’s cheeks blush pink at being naked in front of Ashton. It’s not that they haven’t _all_ seen each other undressed before, they live together so it was inevitable really, but this is different. It’s so _intimate_ and Luke has to close his eyes so he can’t see Ashton’s face.

 

Ashton sees Luke’s shyness and kisses him softly, his hands stroking gently at Luke’s pale thighs. After a while Luke feels ready for Ashton to continue so he moves off Luke and settles between his legs.

 

Luke had no idea beforehand how this boy on boy sex thing was supposed to feel so he had no idea how _good_ it could be. So good in fact that he’s a little worried the people in the room next door will complain about them. It’s not his fault though, it’s Ashton’s for being so darn good with his fingers. At first he was a little embarrassed because he thought he shouldn’t enjoy having Ashton’s fingers inside him so much but then Ashton touched something inside him and nothing mattered.

 

“Oh, shit” Luke breathed out, clutching hold of the sheets. Ashton smiled down at him, relieved Luke was actually really enjoying this.

 

“You liked that?’ Ashton asked, pressing against his prostate again causing Luke to whine particularly loudly and cover his face with his arm.

 

“Fuck, Ashton”

 

“Yes?” Ashton teased, removing his fingers and pressing back in with another added.

 

“I can’t . . .” Luke was really thinking about the prospect of coming from only Ashton fingering him and _was that embarrassing?_ Ashton pressed against his spot again and Luke thought it was more embarrassing that he wanted to cry because this was all too much.

 

“Luke? Are you okay?” Ashton asked because Luke was definitely sniffling and he was scared he’d pushed Luke too far. Luke nodded.

 

“Just . . . overwhelming”

 

“Do you want me to stop?” Ashton asked. Luke shook his head and leaned up to kiss Ashton who started moving his fingers again and used his other hand to stroke his side.

 

In the end Luke wasn’t focused on being embarrassed because he was sure that was the best thing that had ever happened to him and if he and Ashton didn’t do that and more for the rest of their lives he wouldn’t be happy.

 

***

 

 A week later they’re on the sofa together being obscenely cute and couple-y when Luke gets a text. He’s about to ignore it because he’s far too comfy right now but Ashton nudges him and tells him it could be ‘the most important thing ever’. Luke rolls his eyes and makes a point that it could also be spam but Ashton gives him a look and Luke gives in (probably far too easily but not that he cares.) After a bit of a struggle to pull his phone out of his pocket and after Ashton is completely useless at helping him he finally has it in his hand and looks down to check the message.

 

He can’t really hide the strange strangled yelp noise he emits.

 

“What is it?” Ashton sounds really concerned and Luke feels terrible.

 

“Um . . .” Ashton tries to lean over to check so Luke moves the phone out of sight which is totally _not suspicious at all_.

 

“What won’t you let me see?” Ashton asks, kind of hurt and confused and annoyed all at once.

 

“It’s nothing”

 

“Well it obviously is” Ashton peels himself away from Luke and looks at him, expression hard.

 

“Ashton please . . . don’t you trust me?” Luke demands.

 

“Of course I do Luke . . .”

 

“Doesn’t seem like it”

 

“Luke, you’re being . . .”

 

“I’m being what?! I’m not like all the others you just _fuck_ and forget about, I’m supposed to mean something to you!”

 

“Fuck _Luke_ , where is this all coming from?” Ashton looks shocked and Luke can’t handle it because he’s not angry with Ashton at all, he’s angry with himself because he’s an awful person and he’s ruined everything.

 

“The message is from Anna, I never broke up with her and I know that’s a really shitty thing to do and I understand if you hate me because I hate myself for it and I’m really, really sorry.” It comes out in a rush.

 

Luke was half expecting Ashton to pull him close and tell him everything was okay and that he wasn’t mad. He knows he deserves it though when Ashton looks disgusted with him and gets up off the sofa, leaving him alone.

 

***

 

Luke spends the next few days crying and begging Ashton to at least talk to him until he decides Ashton just wants to be left alone so he does so.

 

***

 

 

Luke ends up telling Calum everything because he just _has_ to tell someone.

 

Calum pats his back and lets him cry and tell him in broken sentences all the stuff that’s been happening between him and Ashton. He’s shocked that Calum doesn’t seem more surprised that two of the band have been hooking up behind his back. Calum just laughs when Luke asks.

 

“Luke, you’ve been crushing on Ashton for like, forever, if you hadn’t have noticed I’d have just shoved you on top of him”

 

“Would you really?” Luke asks seriously. Calum laughs again.

 

“Are you even _real_? But of course not, unless you’d both consented to it, but I would’ve done something, your crush was bordering on _painful_ ” Luke’s cheeks heat up and he leans into Calum’s side.

 

“But now I’ve ruined everything”

 

“Maybe, I mean what you did was really fucking stupid” Calum admits, “but Luke, this is Ashton, and likes you as much as you like him so I reckon things will settle down. You’ll just have to do a bit of pleading and a lot of cock sucking”

 

“Calum!”

 

“Luke!” Calum mocks, “you do know how this gay sex stuff works right? ‘Cause I can explain it if you want, me and Michael saw a documentary once . . .”

 

“Shut the fuck up right now, I do not need to hear about that”

 

“Probably for the best” Calum ruffles Luke’s hair.

 

“It’ll all work out”

 

“Thanks Calum”

 

***

 

“Luke?” and Luke is surprised because Ashton is actually talking to him and he doesn’t sound angry.

 

“Yeah?” Luke tries not to sound too eager but he can’t help it because he so desperately wants to work things out with Ashton. Ashton comes to sit next to him, an obvious space between them, not looking at Luke.

 

“You messed up” Ashton states simply, playing with his sleeves. Luke nods.

 

“I know, I really know and . . .”

 

“Don’t apologise again, I’ve heard too much of that” Luke closes his mouth and feels impending tears because what if Ashton can’t forgive him?

 

“I just want you to think, think about how I felt. Because it was like you didn’t want to tell Anna because you weren’t sure about us and she would still be there for you if you decided you didn’t want to be with me. How do you think that made me feel?”

 

“Awful, really, really shit. I know, I do Ashton” Ashton nods and closes his eyes.

 

“Okay”

 

“I understand if you can’t forgive me . . .” Luke says, heart pounding because he’d rather Ashton just _tell_ him he still hated him.

 

“Don’t be ridiculous” Ashton turns to look at Luke properly for the first time in ages.

 

“What?”

 

“I still like you Luke, I don’t think that can change” and Luke can’t believe what Ashton is saying.

 

“You still . . .”

 

“Yes Luke, and I’m willing to move on from this because it was only a mistake and they happen and . . .” Luke practically throws himself at Ashton because he’s so happy and doesn’t know what he did to deserve Ashton. Ashton seems a little shocked but his hands come to wrap around Luke. Luke doesn’t think he’s cried as much ever.

 

“Shush, don’t cry, it’s okay, we’re going to move on from this, don’t worry” which only serves to make Luke cry more because Ashton is there and they’re going to _be okay_.

 

***

 

(Luke breaks things off with Anna the next day and feels like he can breath easier for the first time in too long)

 

*

 

Luke’s not stupid, he knows they’re not perfect, not in the slightest, but he’s happy and as long as he wakes up next to Ashton every morning and they exchange soppy ‘I love yous’ it’s enough for him. Ashton is enough.   

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at Sugarbabystyles.


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